Bsomebody2someone Mentoring Training Series Being a Mentor Thank
Bsomebody2someone Mentoring Training Series Being a Mentor Thank you for choosing to learn more about being a mentor Regardless of how you became one (If youve been asked If youre intention is to be) allow yourself to be human
Mentoring is an intentional relationship where one person encourages another to realise their potential It is a Mentor with a Mentor Partner For it is in giving that we receive. St Francis of Assisi You Must Win the Right to be
Heard Mentors Partners choose their mentors, not visa-versa Mentor has the choice of whether to say yes or no Believe in the Mentor Partner
Mentoring means liking them regardless of what they do Unconditional positive regard doesnt mean unconditional approval If in doubt, encourage and affirm Be Prepared to Give Time
Your time is your greatest gift True giving comes from the heart, it is not something that can be forced or faked To be available is to be accessible
Mentoring is an ongoing relationship. Earning trust takes time Be Prepared to Be Real Mentors open their own world to create a safe environment for openness and honesty
Don't walk behind me, I will not lead Don't walk in front of me, I will not follow Just walk beside me and be my friend Mentors must be prepared to allow access into their own lives Admitting where we struggle doesn't
diminish our effectiveness; it enhances it Listen A Mentor Listens A Mentor Listens A Mentor Listens Be Confidential Unless:
There has been child abuse A life is in danger Otherwise ALWAYS! Respect Their Agenda The agenda belongs to the mentor partner The mentor is not there to manipulate, control or desire to change the partner
Dont get offended Its not about you Allow your Partner to take the Initiative Chase them or give them space? The mentor partner has the overall responsibility to take the initiative
Invite contact Model Character Character is what is left after the fire Effective mentors demonstrate the qualities they wish their partner to
emulate You cant teach above what you live Seek Humility Humility is a core quality of a good mentor Humility is a quality that is more caught than
taught Rather than weakness, humility at its core is strength, power, and courage -all kept in control and balance, and used for the benefit of others, not for personal gain and advancement Guide the Search for Direction
A mentor can assist their partner in discovering direction in their life by exploring passion and values Passion: If you lived in a perfect world, and money was not an issue, what would you really love to give your life to? Values: What is important in your life? How
does the way you prioritise your time reflect what really matters to you? Passion + Value = Goals Point to Support A Mentor
Does not undermine parental authority but is supportive of parents Becomes the parents closest ally Seeks parental permission Points to other mentors and helpers Keep Your Promises Consider the commitment
Keep your promises Keep your mentor partner accountable Leave a Legacy Mentoring reproduction is seeing the people we mentor begin to mentor others Your mentor partner becomes your legacy But as for the best leaders, the people
hardly notice their existence You will Need a Mentor It is important for each mentor to have their own mentor, coach or supervisor to whom they are accountable Dont be afraid to ask for help
Accountability will help the mentor be aware of potential dangers Know What to Ask Remember, let the Partner set the agenda Explore Life Topics: Relationships Family
Anger Spiritual Issues Exercise Work Time Management Money Stress Self Control Conflict Friends Ask permission to challenge Be Careful of the Other Gender
Not ideal, but sometimes good In a cross gender situation you will need to be more sensitive to issues such as: appropriate places to meet times of contact the permission of your mentors partner (and/or your own) and the restriction of certain topics of conversation (such as sexual or some relationship issues)
Be Accountable Appropriate relationship Positive relationship Duty of Care to act with concern as a parent might Keep boundaries
Dont Run Ahead Meet as long as the partner keeps coming back Only schedule one meeting at a time
You can end before you start Initially meetings should become less frequent over time and be eventually governed by need Finish Gracefully Recognise there can be seasons for mentoring
Part of our duty is to release them to move on to the next stage in their life when they need to Allow the relationship to end Graciously Thankfully
Acknowledgements Adapted from: Wayne French, Creating Memories for Teens, Warburton: Signs Publishing Company, 2005 David Stoddard, The Heart of Mentoring, Colorado Springs: Navpress, 2003 The humblest individual exerts some influence, either for good or evil, upon others. Henry Ward Beecher
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